 (0 comments) | Far AwayTake a picture of your octopus as far as possible from its registered address(9420 miles) The humans he induced to take him to Singapore, irritatingly call him Carl. We thought you might like to see how your octopus is doing. Frankly, he finds this whole trip rather irritating. Specifically:
Additional references: Rank: 2 out of 22 |
 (2 comments) | Famous FriendTake a picture of your octopus with a famous person. The more famous, the better.An Angry Octopus Is Me and friend Neil Gaiman send a shout-out to mutual friend Tom Galloway. Mr. Gaiman himself drew the #1 sign to indicate Mr. Galloway's recent revelation that the number one Google result for "Neil" is Mr. Gaiman himself. AAOIM and his amateur photographer appreciate the kind assistance of the many people who made this visit possible.
Rank: 1 out of 19 |
 (0 comments) | Master of EightDemonstrate your mastery of Eightness.Suspended in an octahedron of his own design and engineering, An Angry Octopus Is Me contemplates the mysteries of the number 8. For lo, planes and angles divide and subdivide into 8 smaller octahedrons, at the center of which is found the octopode himself.
Rank: 3 out of 15 |
 (0 comments) | Altitude I(Flying Split) Take a picture of your Octopus at the highest possible altitude, while flying.Cruising at 30,000 feet, An Angry Octopus Is Me flies above the clouds. Helpful humans hold up a boarding pass.
Rank: 11 out of 13 |
 (0 comments) | FriendsFit as many registered octopodes as possible into the same picture. (The more the better.)Eleven octopodes, six sidekicks, and three artifacts. Artifact Bonus: 3
Rank: 1 out of 18 |
 (2 comments) | FriendsFit as many registered octopodes as possible into the same picture. (The more the better.)Tako Yaki, Tudo Azul, Clone IV, An Angry Octopus Is Me, Octopus Prime, 3 hexapod sidekicks plus Squirt. 3 artifacts: Mantle, Crown, Torc.
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Rank: 5 out of 18 |
 (0 comments) | FriendsFit as many registered octopodes as possible into the same picture. (The more the better.)An Angry Octopus Is Me entertains friend Linus in his home: note the recently-drained glass of plum wine. (Just because one is Angry does not mean one is not Gracious.)
Rank: 16 out of 18 |
 (1 comment) | FriendsFit as many registered octopodes as possible into the same picture. (The more the better.)An Angry Octopus Is Me and Tudo Azul, along with an unregistered friend, rest, well-sated after some fine bulgoki.
Rank: 12 out of 18 |
 (0 comments) | PedigreeDocument your octopus' suitability to be king.Resplendent in purple and gold, trident in hand, An Angry Octopus Is Me reviews his troops in eight-square formation, accompanied by the great Beast he has tamed to show his might and mercy, pursuant to lessons learned from the great work *The Prince* by the human Machiavelli. According to Machiavelli, the two most essential foundations for any state, whether old or new, are sound laws and strong military forces. Additional evidence shows An Angry Octopus Is Me studying such matters. A self-sufficient prince is one who can meet any enemy on the battlefield. A prince that relies solely on fortifications or on the help of others and stands on the defensive is not self-sufficient. Rather than rely on mercenary or auxiliary forces, An Angry Octopus Is Me alone commands an army composed entirely of fellow-citizen octopodes.
Additional references: Rank: 3 out of 19 |
 (1 comment) | Hunting ProwessDemonstrate your octopus' hunting ability.An Angry Octopus Is Me lulls its prey into a false sense of security, toying with the target, perhaps even...playing.... Then, Angry Octopus Is Me completes the hunt, sneaking up to snare its prey (which is distracted by a book on Sea Creatures, of all things).
Additional references: Rank: 7 out of 17 |
 (0 comments) | AddressTake a picture of your octopus with the largest house/building street number available.An Angry Octopus Is Me visits Jerry's Hardware on West Boylston Street.
Rank: 14 out of 15 |
 (0 comments) | AquaticDemonstrate that your octopus is at home in an aquatic environment.After a long day downing ships at sea, An Angry Octopus Is Me relaxes in a pond by a lush waterfall, enjoying a recently liberated barrel of rum. How much more at home can a 'pode be when the humidity (note monitor) is a refreshing 75%?
Rank: 13 out of 20 |
 (0 comments) | EnnuiThe octopus most mired in ennuiWatching paint dry...watching grass grow...and Camus. How can one ever go on?
Rank: 6 out of 14 |
 (0 comments) | CostumeThe octopus with the best Halloween costumeResistance is futile. I wish to note for the consideration of the judge that the photo is *not* photoshopped in any way. That is an actual laser. (Rose and I have no photoshop skillz anyway.)
Rank: 5 out of 11 |
 (0 comments) | Altitude II(Ground Split) Take a picture of your octopus at rest (on the ground or on top of a structure), at the highest possible altitude.An Angry Octopus Is Me atop Drury Hill in Holden, MA (at the corner of Wentworth Drive and Parker Avenue). Elevation over 800' above sea level, per Google Maps.
Rank: 8 out of 17 |
 (4 comments) | CooperationMultiple octopodes cooperate together to accomplish something no single octopus could do alone!From Wikipedia: A minyan מנין (Hebrew: plural minyanim) in Judaism is a quorum of ten or more adult Jews assembled for purposes of fulfilling a public religious obligation requiring a quorum. In contemporary Judaism, the most common activity involved is public prayer.
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Rank: 4 out of 10 |
 (0 comments) | CamouflageOctopodes are masters of color-changing and camouflage to perfectly blend in with their backgrounds. Or maybe they just choose their backgrounds very carefully.An Angry Octopus Is Me sneaks among the shrubbery outside the home of (completely) unsuspecting humans.
Rank: 12 out of 18 |
 (0 comments) | StackThe tallest stack of octopodesEleven Octopodes, six sidekicks, three artifacts, and Indy's hat Artifact Bonus: 3
Rank: 2 out of 14 |
 (0 comments) | StackThe tallest stack of octopodesStack (bottom to top): Tako Yaki, Tudo Azul, Clone IV, An Angry Octopus Is Me, Octopus Prime, 2 sidekicks (plus Squirt, at side). 3 artifacts: Mantle, Crown, Torc. No walls, no hidden wires! Artifact Bonus: 3
Rank: 5 out of 14 |
 (0 comments) | Scrabble I(Original Split) Photograph your octopus with a commercial sign with the highest-Scrabble-scoring word of eight letters or less. (Proper names ok. Scoring site here.)Zoombezi (as in, Zoombezi Bay) = 30 points.
Rank: 10 out of 19 |
 (0 comments) | lolctopusBest lolctopus (see lolcat)Rank: 7 out of 16 |
 (0 comments) | MazeBecause of their intelligence and flexibility, octopodes are very good at solving mazes.An Angry Octopus Is Me is a whiz at solving labyrinths in more than one dimension.
Rank: 8 out of 11 |
 (0 comments) | Ballistic I(Safe split) Safely send your octopus on the longest possible ballistic trajectory. Clearly document the distances involved.An Angry Octopus Is Me enjoys a ride through the air in his clear shielding, propelled by baseball bat. Total distance 36 feet.
(1) An Angry Octopus Is Me modeling the safety shield.
Additional references: Rank: 2 out of 6 |
 (0 comments) | QueposkivingSend a picture of your octopus with the best example of a queposkyAn Angry Octopus Is Me, considering that Queposky is a likely transcription of "Quepos Key," points out the key on a map of Quepos, Costa Rica.
Additional references: Rank: 8 out of 10 |
 (0 comments) | TeachingOne octopus teaches interesting lessons to other octopodes.1. Professor Octopus Prime with three octopodes helping demonstrate, 2. Taking notes, 3. The sidekick section (with chaperones), 4. The octopus student
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Rank: 1 out of 7 |
 (0 comments) | Ballistic II(Death-defying split) Send your octopus on the longest possible ballistic trajectory. Clearly document the distances involved.An Angry Octopus Is Me is hurled, helmetless, for 89 feet. (1) Look, ma, no helmet! (2) Long shot from landing, looking back over the distance traveled.
Additional references: Rank: 5 out of 8 |
 (1 comment) | StoryUse a group of octopodes to re-enact a classic story (or a good scene from one)And so, Dr Jones, what was yours, is now mine. Artifact Bonus: 2
Rank: 4 out of 4 |
 (1 comment) | Head SittingStatistically, it appears that sitting on the heads of people and other octopodes is part of the Octopus Nature. Keep your octopus on your head for the greatest length of time, without the aid of string, hats, fancy hair tricks, or other fasteners.Driving to Somerville from 2:44pm to 3:45pm. One hour, one minute. Slipped off as soon as owner of head tried to exit car.
Additional references: Rank: 6 out of 9 |
(0 comments) | Scrabble II(Strict Split) Photograph your octopus with a commercial sign with the highest *valid* Scrabble scoring word. (Scoring site here)Zoombezi (as in, Zoombezi Bay) = 30 points.
Rank: 16 out of 19 |
 (0 comments) | EnteringDue to their squishability and flexibility, octopodes are very good at getting into small, hard-to-get-into places. Document your octopus in the best example of somewhere hard to get into.An Angry Octopus Is Me sealed in a glass jar.
Rank: 11 out of 13 |
 (0 comments) | CookingDemonstrate your octopus's ability to feed a hungry family, or the multitudes!An Angry Octopus Is Me runs a soup kitchen for the many octopodes within the purview of his great mercy.
Rank: 4 out of 8 |
 (0 comments) | Meta EssenceThe octopus with the most glamorous glamour photo.Rank: 8 out of 34 |
(0 comments) | Meta PowerThe octopus scoring zero in the most contests.Rank: 11 out of 34 |
(0 comments) | Meta FellowshipYour octopus's cultural diversity is measured with an arcane algorithm that rewards cooperation with octopodes who are less popular.Rank: 8 out of 34 |
